How Pizza Turned Into Jerusalem Artichoke Risotto (By Accident)

I get a lot of questions about my cooking habits. Questions, and general puzzlement, and facial expressions that seem to say, "But why did you make your own salsa? Did that really seem like the best use of an hour of your life?"

Well, first of all, I don't have children. That frees up lots of time and creative energy right there. Second of all, the cooking sometimes happens by accident.

Take Friday night. I called The Viking utterly exhausted from the work week, and the conversation went something like this:

The Viking: What are we doing for dinner tonight?

Me: I don't know. I'm exhausted. I'm definitely not cooking tonight. Definitely not.

The Viking: OK, well we should just order pizza. Go home, put your feet up, and we'll order a pizza.

Me: Perfect.

And then my thoughts went something like this:

I'll just stop by the grocery store for some paper towels and OJ, on my way home.

...Now that I'm at the grocery store, I might as well pick up a frozen pizza. That will be cheaper than ordering pizza.

...But frozen pizza is so unhealthy, and it's never any good. As long as I'm here I might as well buy a chicken to roast. That's barely cooking.

....Ugh, look at this industrial, mass-produced chicken. It's so disgusting. I cannot, in good conscience, buy and eat this chicken.

....Hey look, arborio rice! I could make risotto, I even have Parmesan and white wine and chicken stock in the fridge. I haven't made risotto in ages. I'll just make really easy risotto and be done with it.

...Actually, I have those Jerusalem artichokes too. I wonder how you cook a Jerusalem artichoke? I wonder if you can make Jerusalem artichoke risotto...?

Fast forward to 9 PM, at which point I was pureeing sauteed Jerusalem artichokes in a food processor and folding them into a risotto with herbs and pancetta.

It was my first experience with Jerusalem artichokes, which are neither artichokes nor are they from Jerusalem.



They're a tuber that looks like a cross between ginger and a massage tool and tastes like a cross between a mushroom and an artichoke. Pureed and mixed into the risotto they in fact did add an earthy compliment to the smokey pancetta and full-bodied Parmesan. All in all, it was a nice dish.

Nicer than an evening on the couch with a beer, a slice, and an episode of Mad Men? That's up for debate.